Who's Calling?

Who's calling?" was the answer to the telephone.

     "Watt."

     "What is your name, please?"

     "Watt's my name."

     "That's what I asked you. What's your name?"

     "That's what I told you. Watt's my name."

  A long pause, and then from Watt, "Is this James Brown?"

     "No, this is Knott."

     "Please tell me your name."

     "Will Knott."

     YOU LEFT THE TALKERS AT A POINT WHERE THEY WERE TOTALLY

     CONFUSED, READ THE REST OF WHAT HAPPENED...

     Why not?

     Huh? What do you mean why not?

     Yeah! Why won't you tell me your name?

     But I told you my name!

     Didn't you say you will not?

     Not not, knott, Will Knott!

     That's what I mean.

     So you know my name.

     Of course not!

     Good. So now, what is yours?

     Watt. Yours?

     Your name!

     Watt's my name.

     How the hell do I know? I am asking you!

     Look I have been very patient and I have told you my name and

     you have not even told me yours yet.

     You have been patient, what about me? I have told you my

     name so many times and it is you who have not told me yours yet.

     Of course not!

     See, you even know my name!

     Of course not!

     Then why do you keep saying of course Knott?

     Because I don't.

     [Pause]

     What is your name?

     See, you know my name!

     Of course not!

     Then why do you keep asking Watt is your name?

     To find out your name!

     But you already know it!

     What?

     See, and you know mine!

     Of course not!

     Exactly!

     NOW THEY ARE AT A POINT WHERE BOTH THINK THE OTHER KNOWS

     THEIR NAME, BUT THEY THEMSELVES DON'T KNOW THE OTHER'S NAME.

     Listen, listen, wait; if I asked you what your name is, what

     will be your answer?

     Watt's my name.

     No, no, give me only one word.

     Watt

     Your name!

     Right!

     [pause before it hits him]

     Oh, Wright!

     Yeah!

     So why didn't you say it before?

     I told you so many times!

     You never said Wright before

     Of course I did.

     Ok I won't argue any more. Do you know my name?

     I do not.

     Well, there you go, now we know each other's name.

     I do not!

     Good!

     [pause before it hits him]

     Oh, Guud!

     Good.

     No wonder, it took me so long, is that Dutch?

     No, it's Knott!

     Oh, okay. At least the names are clear now Guud.

     Yes Wright.

     NOW THEY BOTH THINK THEY KNOW EACH OTHER'S NAME AS WELL!

     __________________________________________________________________

     Watt do you think ?? Do they or do they Knott ???

Help Me Cross the River

 get to the other side, but had no idea on how to do it.

The first man prayed to God saying, "Please God, give me the strength to cross this river.

"Poof! God gave him big arms and strong legs and he was able to swim across the river in

 about two hours.

Seeing this, the second man prayed to God saying,"Please God, Give me the strength and

ability to cross the river. "Poof! God gave him rowboat and he was able to row across the river

in about three hours.

The third man had seen how this worked out for the other two, so he also prayed to God saying

"Please God, give me the strength, ability and intelligence to cross this river." And Poof! God

turned him into a woman. She looked at the map, them walked across the bridge ... LOL

Who Did It ?

There is a story about four people. Their names are EVERYBODY, SOMEBODY, ANYBODY, and NOBODY.

The story goes that there was a very important job that needed to be done. EVERYBODY was asked to do this job. Now ANYBODY could have done this job but NOBODY was willing to do it. Then SOMEBODY got angry about this because it was EVERYBODY'S job to do. Well, EVERYBODY thought that ANYBODY could have done it! But NOBODY realized that EVERYBODY blamed SOMEBODY for not doing the job. Still NOBODY did it. The arguing got worse and finally NOBODY would talk to ANYBODY and EVERYBODY blamed SOMEBODY. What a shame that ANYBODY could have done the job and EVERYBODY could have helped SOMEBODY but yet NOBODY did it! If there is something you know must be done, don't wait for ANYBODY else to do it or hope that SOMEBODY else will do it because NOBODY else will do it unless you show EVERYBODY else how to do it.

If Only Life could be like a Computer!

   If you messed up your life, you could press "Alt, Ctrl, Delete" and start all over!

    To get your daily exercise, just click on "run"!

     If you needed a break from life, click on "suspend".

     Hit "any key" to continue life when ready.        

    To get even with the neighbors, turn up the sound blaster.

    To "add/remove" someone in your life, click settings and control panel.

    To improve your appearance, just adjust the display settings.

    If life gets too noisy, turn off the speakers.

    When you lose your car keys, click on "find".

    "Help" with the chores is just a click away.

    You wouldn't need auto insurance.  You'd use your diskette to recover from a crash.

    We could click on "send" and the kids would go to bed immediately.

    To feel like a new person, click on "refresh".

    Click on "close" to shut up the kids and spouse.

    To undo a mistake, click on "back".

    Is your wardrobe getting old? Click "update".

    If you don't like cleaning the litter box, click on "delete".